Physically restraining my inner feminist

So, Dr Pepper has a new commercial out for their tasty tasty new soda:


Second thought: Maybe I should lay off the caffeine. Maybe the doctor gave that no caffeine order for a reason other than the one she told me…

Third thought: My can is empty. I should go grab another soda.

I realize that this marketing ploy is no different from the Axe, Old Spice or Captain Morgan commercials that have been flooding the market for years. So why does this commercial make my inner Women’s Studies Major with hairy legs want to bust out her whip of emancipation? I think it’s because these commercials suggest that because the soda is ten calories per can that no woman will drink it. Because of ten calories.

I had a mini peach pie for lunch. With a Dr Pepper 10. Fuck you commercial.

The biggest issue I have with advertising campaigns like this is shit like this:

“TEN Man-ments?” There it is. That’s what makes me want to punch a Dr Pepper can (after I empty it, of course) and then stomp on it. I hate, HATE, this “return to manliness” craze that’s been sweeping the nation and the media. Man caves, twelve channels of nothing but football, “man-sized” servings of whatever. I’m sick of it. You know who was a real man? This son of a bitch:

In case you didn’t click on the photo to read the article for yourself, this man was a Jewish photographer on the frontlines during World War II. I’m willing to bet he never had a man cave. There is no man cave big enough for his balls.

Listen, I’m not saying that it wasn’t a funny commercial. I laughed my butt off when I saw it the first time! What I am saying is that I doubt this “return to manliness” movement is a step in the right direction. It’s not a return to men being men and accepting responsibility, protecting their hearth and home or returning to the values and ethics that our rose-colored glasses allow us to attribute to men in ages past. This is just a cry for men to be more dudely, crush beer cans against their foreheads while filming drunken antics for Tosh.0 and Web Soup.

Which I watch with glee.

I can’t help feeling, though, that there needs to be less man cave action and more emphasis on men (and women! Get off your Desperate Housewife/Sex in the City laurels there ladies!) becoming MEN. Not dudes, not guys but men. Someone who’ll keep their word, do the right thing and occasionally suffer through “Down With Love” when their lady’s in the mood to watch it.


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